I've been listening to Bob Dylan a lot as of late. Sadly, I just learned that All Along the Watchtower was not originally by Hendrix (oops). I'm kind of embarrassed to not know this before, but hey, I can't know everything about music and songs and what not. But it makes me want to expand my collection of Bob's songs to more than just the three that I magically have on my itunes. Anyways, the point is that some of these songs have got me thinking.
It seems like everything is changing right now and I think I'm going to welcome it. My job is up in the air, which doesn't really matter since I need a new one anyway and it just lights a little fire under my ass (which is what I need). I just really want to be able to move out this summer and even if it means working more hours for less money, I'll be willing to do it. Sometimes you just have to do what needs to be done and if that means taking a job that isn't quite what I had in mind- so be it. I'll be happy to have a job and hopefully I'll find a way to challenge myself in it.
I feel like for the past few years I've been holding back. With school and work and everything I just don't put in a lot of effort. It's not like I try to find ways to slack off or I consciously decide to goof around- I just have a serious lack of motivation and I don't know why. I don't know if I can say that it is the same reason I did so poorly in high school which was "I wasn't being challenged enough." But if that isn't it, I don't know what it is. I mean, I know what it's like to work hard and feel that satisfaction of a job well done, but maybe that's what I'm missing. I like to accomplish things but when it's not a challenge, what is the point? Winning doesn't feel as good if it's an easy victory. So maybe that's the answer. I know I can do well if I put in the effort but I need to make myself put that effort in. So the challenge doesn't lie in the task itself but in motivating myself to give something my all.
This all comes in at a good time since I am a multitasking girl these days. Things to accomplish include: (1) Find a job- preferably one with good pay and benefits, but beggars can't be choosers, (2) Pass my Spanish 402 class- an A would be nice, but this prof needs to seriously see a doctor about that stick stuck up her.... (3) Complete the Eppie's Great Race- this will be my biggest challenge since exercise is the main component here.
So there you have it. Change is happening and I'm so ready for it. I have a really good feeling about this summer. I think things are going to work out for the best and even though I might find myself with some new challenges, it could be exactly what I need right now. I'm so hopeful for my future and what's in store for me. I think as long as I keep my head up and pray, I'll be just fine.
These pictures don't have much to do with anything other than I was looking at photographers who are interesting and one of those is Jerry Uelsmann. All of his work is done in a darkroom- no computers or photoshop. Just him and as many as 11 enlargers. Crazy! Just felt like putting a couple pictures up.
Paz,
me
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